more catting about

I found a message board for people like me who are trans-species, or have species dysphoria. I also found out that there’s another name for it: otherkin. I don’t like that one as much as trans-species, though. species dysphoria makes it sound like there’s something wrong with me, like I’m sick. otherkin makes it sound like I believe in fairies or something. trans-species sounds like it’s just a thing, like transgender or transsexual. like I’m just someone who was born into the wrong body, only I’m not a boy in a girl’s body. I’m a cat in a girl’s body.

so I’ve been on these message boards, talking to other people about things. and I feel better about myself, but also worse because, I mean, transgender would be hard enough for people to understand. there’s no way they could understand trans-species unless they were it, too. I guess that’s why mom went away. she saw the signs in me and was worried that I’d follow in her footsteps so she left. she didn’t want me to end up in the life that she had. but I have. so I’ve been trying to look for her.

I’ve made some friends on the boards. most of them are a lot older than me, so I’ve been asking around about my mom. I’ve been talking to my dad and been trying to call my stepdad. for once, darleen’s been pretty cool about things. guess she thinks I’ve had it rough enough already. it doesn’t feel right that my mom would have left me thinking she’s dead. my dad says that she hoped she’d be able to talk to me later on in my life, but it was gonna be at time when she and my dad thought I was ready. only my dad hasn’t heard from her in months. or from her husband.

dad doesn’t want to tell me much about the relationship mom had (has?) with her husband. I can kinda guess just from what I’ve figured out on the forums and little things I put together over the years. my stepdad acted like, I dunno, my mom’s owner. he took care of her. so when she “died” they both left and he’s been taking care of her at the cat commune. I don’t know exactly what it all means. just that he’s helping her live her life as she wants to live it. I have no idea how they can afford it. he must be working tech from his computer or something. that’s what he used to do.

there are parts of the message boards I can’t go to because I’m too young. I don’t really want to know what mom does with brian anyway, so I’m glad I can’t read about that crap. the older members are protective of me because I’m so young and because of what happened with my mom. they’re all keeping an eye out for me, to see if they hear anything about a commune like what my dad said.

I don’t know if I should even try to find her. I want to. I want to leave school and just go searching for her, but that’s not what she’d want. I hate myself for feeling that way. and I can’t shake the feeling that maybe brian has been keeping her from me. I don’t know.

hopefully I’ll find out more soon.

in other news, school’s ok (not great) and I’m getting better on the guitar, despite actually being a cat.

30 Responses to “ “more catting about”

  1. Nathan Esparza says:

    Kitty, if you’re real, sorry for the troubles in your life but THIS IS NOT YOUR BLOG!!! If you’re not, and this is really just Mr. Steele being creative, well done, sir, mission accomplished.

  2. King Icoris says:

    I can’t believe all that happened to you! I also can’t believe you’re not responding to the comments! I mean, we all love you here! Oh, and what forum are all the trans-species at? Can I go there if I feel like Louis XVI trapped in a boy’s body? or do I go on L. Ron Hubbard’s Facebook?

    Okay, I’m sorry I’m hating. If this is real, then why? Waht is the point of posting here of all places? (Allow me to answer for you) Because, it’s not! A cat knows when it’s not wanted.

  3. the pope says:

    I don’t even know any more…

  4. OneWithTheShades says:

    Well, it looks like this kitty…
    …doesn’t have claws.


  5. Jacob says:

    amy, you need to be less… CATTY!!!

  6. Yuki says:

    Why is it that whenever I read one of the blog posts I wanna listen to a Brookers related KnoxKast ep?

  7. Kevolution says:

    I swear to God, this must be a prequel to Detective Mittens.

  8. wat says:


    As soon as I read that, I knew that this series of blog posts is going to be a long ride.

    Anyway, at least I finally understand the picture to the right near the top.

  9. Carbonated Chocolate Cake says:

    why is this happening?……

  10. indianasmith says:

    GOOD GRIEF!!!!!

    YOU . . . ARE . . . NOT . . . A . . . CAT!!!!

    You are a whiny, mentally ill teenager who has taken over a blog that DOES NOT belong to you! GO AWAY!!!

    And Jason, if this is you, please knock it off already. Please??? I’ll give you an authentic Indian arrowhead!

    • Freeziez says:

      just leave if you don’t like it

    • ThatOneChick says:

      Dude. Chill. If she’s legit, it’s basically like she’s transgendered, except with, you know, a cat. I can understand that, and it certainly doesn’t make her “mentally ill.” It’s not that she thinks she’s physically a cat, it’s that, internally, she feels more like a cat than anything else.
      As far as the blog-jacking and the whinyness… That I agree to wholeheartedly. XD

      • Anonymous says:

        im kinda surprised people are still telling her to get off this blog and are angry that she ‘jacked’ it. ima go ahead and do something about the clear flaws in this logic

        1. it is HIGHLY unlikely she stole this blog. most likely this is jason or someone else copying and pasting content from another blog onto this one in the hopes that people would react strongly to it. seeing how mature everyone has been about this whole thing and NOT been whining about no longer getting videos to watch for free, i can see they completely and totally failed.

        2. in an earlier post, she said that she MADE this blog. how did no one spot that? also, judging from the way she talked about making a new blog and the way she talked afterwards, it seems like whoever is copy-and-pasting this started copy-and-pasting from her new blog. clearly, the filmcow blog is still the same blog as it has always been so if she stole this blog, why would she even mention starting a new blog? not to mention the fact that she doesnt even seem that techy, so the idea of her cracking this blog is a bit absurd

        3. this is pretty much how a lot of teenage girls write. while jason makes some pretty amusing videos, I don’t think that he’s this good a writer or that this is his style or genre. if he is writing this, he needs to hurry up and write a book so that he wont need to worry about money anymore and can just make videos, which he seems to enjoy doing.

        However, for those of you who are still not convinced and would like jason to start making videos again, heres what you should do to help the process

        1. become EXCEEDINGLY OUTRAGED that your favorite animator is giving more attention to his social life than you

        2. vent your anger into respective animators blog demanding that he make more videos and cease this informing you about this teenage girls life. you refuse to be informed and can think of no better way to cease the information flow than to remain on the blog and comment about how distraught or angry you are

        3. finish your comment with joke about previous videos with your own twist that no one finds clever or funny

        4. seethe with your fellow overzealous fans

        and its not an arrowhead, its called a projectile point. this is not india, it is north america. authentic projectile points are not hard to acquire; i work with them everyday. so please STFU your ignorant face.

        archaeologist rage haha

        • ThatOneChick says:

          You are just all up into yourself, aren’t you? Impressive- you’ve out-high-horsed Karma.
          1. So…? This still qualifies as “blog-jacking,” because the blog is being used for purposes other than what was originally intended. And I doubt Jason would do this, seeing as, you know, Jason’s not an idiot. And if it was someone else, then someone else STILL JACKED THE BLOG.
          2. Aye, she did say she “made” this blog- but there’s also a comment on one of the posts that says that he cracked the blog FOR her. You missed that completely, good sir, so there goes the logic behind THAT post…
          3. Will you please be consistent? Do you believe that it IS an irritating teenage girl, or not? If you do, hey, more power to you. If you don’t, hey, more power to you.
          Either way, your condescending tone is both disgustingly unjustified and so ridiculously ill-placed that it disqualifies anything you could have said. Really? You respond to MY comment? I only have one little tiny little thing even ABOUT the possibility of her being a real chick, and the entire rest of my post is completely about the overly-general nature of the post I was replying to. Hell, dude, the one I REPLIED to would have been more appropriate for the irritating smugness in this post.
          Also, “arrowhead” is the commonly used term for a projectile point, and common usage is well-justifed within the English Language, just like “panthera leonis” is called a “lion.” And also, aye, he may have meant Native Americans, but you know what? Again, common usage. If you’re on a tirade against the usage of the word “Indian” to describe Native Americans, this is not the place to crusade your cause, fella.
          Stop being so bloody condescending. You sound like a dumbass.

  11. LOLephant In The Room says:

    *facepalm* X( I’m curious as to when these so-called “new videos” are coming out that were talked about in the trailor for the feature film. Please release those, I need my sanity back.

  12. Remy says:

    I like that at the beginning of the post she doesn’t know the stepdad’s name, then she calls him brian…

  13. Random Austrian says:


  14. Ladidoo says:

    Are you kidding me? You really think you’re a cat…

    I sure hope this is the owner of the site being creative.
    o-o Or you should probably go get yourself checked out, hun….

  15. darby says:

    kitty,i know what you are, but it’s ok, i still love you. if you ever need an “owner” i will be there for you!

  16. Mathias says:

    This has gotten quite entertaining and exciting. What will Kittyamy96 write next?

    That she’s found her mother?

    Clawed her dad to death?

    Or gotten addicted to catnip?

    Find out next time, on KittyAmy96, the cat stuck in the body of a teenage girl with family problems!

    This is a very interesting way of telling a story, Jason is a genius.

  17. Mr. Tastix says:

    Clearly Jason Steele has multiple personality disorder and one of his possibly many alter egos is a cat.

    Jason Steele may or may not be a woman, however.